So it is 11:00 am, and I am already hungry... Had some iced tea so far, so I could take my vitamins and pills. I am a stay at home mom, and my hardest time is when I have to feed my kids! I desperately want to have just one cheerio, but I know me... If I break this soon, the whole thing is off! Maybe this evening, I can have some carrots or something but not yet... I will just keep snacking the whole day if I start now! SO Not happening! I think it is time for some milk (skim, of course)... That should give my tummy something to digest. I think I am going to take the kids outside before it rains... Keep me away from the fucking refrigerator! For lunch, I am having one of my favorite things: A huge glass of water, with 3 Chicken bullion cubes in it (15cal total) and a dash of ceyenne pepper. MMMMMmmmm! Soup!!! Then dinner tonight is a protein drink... Chocolate flavored! So, I just got back from a 2 week long vacation, and I gained, like, a LOT!!!! I knew I would... 2 weeks of eating out, and not counting cals, or points or anything... Eating WHATEVER I wanted! So I weighed this am, and I was 215.4 or something, but I just re-weighed, and I am 214.6 with clothes on... That is encouraging! Still, who gains freakin 9 pounds in 2 weeks?! I fucking hate my appetite! I literally could eat 3,000 cals, and it wouldn't even phase me. I'd still be hungry, but like my Mother-in-law says, "I'm Hungry even when I eat, so I would rather be hungry and skinny, than hungry and fat"... I must agree. I am trying to get my mind to embrace the feeling of hunger as a good thing... Not as something that I need to eat to get rid of. God, that is hard! Gotta figure out my exercise tho. We are just a little strapped for cash at the moment, or I would go join our community gym. My neighbour works out every single day, so he said he would take me with him when he goes. I just can't afford it yet. I guess I will have to do what I can with cutting cals. I will probably be able to get to about 190 without it, but it will be too slow... Maybe I can find some good workout DVD's at the library or something. Enough for now...
Ana-Nae
Hey! I love the gross reversre thinspo on your blog..! (eyes buggin out, looking at it..eeew)
ReplyDeleteOmygosh, I know exactly what you mean about the appetite thing! Im just like that. A little advise from me would be to not binge. (like duh..lol). But you know if you do, it just expands your tummy, and makes you eat more and more, to feel fuller everytime. I unfortunatly am learning this the hard way :(.
But thank you soooo much for your comment on my post! I totaly agree with you, its what we afterwards that makes us more stronger in the long run. I wont get caught up in the failure. Thanks again! And yay, im your first follower! :)